Category: Totally Tatum

Friday. Half Day. 11:12am. Parking Lot PVCP

You’re late!

She always had wanted me to come 15 minutes late so she could talk with her friends. Well, lately, that has been a wish not granted. Not that she wants to come home and be schooled. But, she wouldn’t mind being home; especially this next week. So, we begin!

First stop: Bird store! Our three little chickies needed food, so it was also an excuse to see any new birds that are available. These little cockatiels looked so cute without their crests!

Of course it was time for Target. That is unfortunately an expensive happy place. It seems to have a way of stealing my money. Well, Tatum needed a few clothes, and somehow, this got into the basket. He’s one of those weighted stuffies. Pickle is now a new member of our family.

Later, since it God forgot to give us Spring, Tatum decided to go swimming. Now, our pool is not “swim” worthy yet, but it is inviting when it’s 95 degrees in March. (I KNOW!). So, she took it all in.

She borrowed my bathing suit later (she fits in it…when did this happen!?), and did the whole sunbathing process, but today, it was just a toesy in the water.

We always watch a show during lunch. We finished the Downton Abbey series. After my breakdown and cry fest, we found another. I have to say, it’s almost as good. It’s called All Creatures Great and Small, and it’s about this veterinarian (James Herriot) in the 1930’s Yorkshire Dales. He wrote books about this and they turned it into a series. The storyline and cast are humorous and compassionate; the setting is gorgeous. We love to watch this. Guess who else does? Yes, Coopy had to find out how this doggie fared after surgery. He is glued to the show.

Well, there was more to come on the weekend. Stay tuned for Monday and Tuesday’s adventures. In the meantime, look at the competition I have for the greatest breakfast? Yes, Tot is learning!

And Pickle watches.

Meanwhile, Pickle and Coopy are getting to know each other.

Ten full days. We finally went to the doctor after the “mystery” symptoms continued. I didn’t have the luxury of fancy fingers to feel her “nodules” on her throat. Nor did I put pressure hear her eyes above her nose for her to go “OW!” The doctor has the fancy touch.

It was a long week of her not getting better! Her fever broke on Tuesday, and we would say, OK, back to school on _______. You can get your homework done tomorrow and then go back the following day. That following day never happened. She would try to come out early of her bedroom, but this is how she would communicate:

Then I’d come and say:
YOU NEED…

Electrolytes

Honey

An apple squeezey

Water

I don’t know!!! AAAAAHH!!!

And the day would go on with more mystery.

Then the next day:

And more:

The SCREAMING CAPS!

Ok. That. is. it.

We are going to the DOCTOR!!

Sunday (thank GOD) they were open

Our favorite Urgent care, and you know the rest of the story.

After we left the doc, we picked up her RX at Walgreens and I immediately had her drink a protein drink with her first dose. We also loaded up on some stuffies, squeeze toys, and slime. The OTHER kind of medicine for the girl.

She seems to be better already, and I’m so grateful.

Now, if we can get her back to school tomorrow, all will be well.

Thank you, Jesus, for helping my sweet girl.

And then what!?

Really!!?

Tatum has been home sick since Monday.

She came back from church camp Sunday night already feeling awful. By Monday morning the fever had arrived, and it stayed for three long days. When the fever finally eased, the nausea and stomach issues took its place. It’s been one of those weeks where the body just refuses to cooperate.

Today she stayed home again, trying to catch up on schoolwork before the last day of the quarter tomorrow. Tests, assignments, all of it waiting.

It’s been a hard few days.

Not just because she’s been sick, but because I’m not exactly at my strongest either. I wanted to be the kind of mom who effortlessly fixes everything. But this week looked different. I simply did the best I could.

We watched a lot of Downton Abbey. Both movies. And she slept ALOT.

We navigated high fevers, empty stomachs, and the frustrating cycle of trying to eat and not being able to keep food down. On Wednesday she broke down crying.

“I HATE being sick!”

Of all people, I understand.

When you’re sick long enough, the emotions come in waves. First you get angry. Then you get sad. Then you get mad again. It’s exhausting, and it feels unfair.

I didn’t try to fix it.

I just sat with her in it.

Because sometimes the best thing a mom can do is simply understand the feeling.

I love that girl so much. Watching her suffer hurts in a way that’s hard to describe. If I could take it from her, I would in a second.

She isn’t alone.

Not for a second.

So I sing to Ollie. I stare at Coopy as he looks at us from below (please let me come up there!!)

Get better Taties. WE all love you so much!

Today was it.

His last day preaching as Sr. Pastor.

We all stood for minutes clapping and cheering as he stood to preach.

A tear would form in my eye. Seriously.

For me, it was a slow admiration. When he first arrived to SBC 17 years ago, I was less than pumped. I was used to Darryl DelHousaye and his phenomenal preaching (plus his extra large heart and love for people). But, Jamie Rasmussen grew on me. As a family we would sit directly in front just to hear every word. He was not only growing on me, his words would become something I would crave weekly. Our church grew tremendously in these last few years because of his leadership and vision.

Every message he would preach would center around ONE THEME:

Grace.

Yes, Grace.

No ego. No haughtiness. No piety. No holier than thou.

Just Grace.

Wow, do we all need to hear this. Why? Well, that is what his last message was all about.

Three simple points:

1. Life is not fair.

This is truly why God sent Jesus. Grace and mercy abounds. Think of the prodigal son and his “perfect” older brother. This older brother would mouth these words..THAT IS NOT FAIR! I’ve done EVERYTHING right and you reward HIM?? God’s grace and mercy ERASE fairness. God says, “You deserve what you get, but guess what? I overlook ALL OF IT.” Ergo, Jesus. He is our ticket to grace, mercy, and eternal life (and I’ll add PEACE).

2. You are not entitled.

When we expect God’s blessings because we’ve done it all perfectly (read our Bibles, been on time, had a good job, been a good mom or dad, gone to church weekly…blah blah blah..), we (not stating it out loud) BELIEVE and FEEL we DESERVE all HIS blessings, RIGHT!!? If we did live this way, guess what happens, you become an angry, discouraged, resentful human. I don’t “deserve” anything EXCEPT God’s ONE promise. “I will never leave you nor forsake you/ I will BE WITH YOU till the end of the age.” DONE. (it was done through Jesus). Ah, now that is peace. And that leads to point 3.

3. The Father Loves you Anyway.

In Luke 15: 31-32 “My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. ³² But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’” And then it ends. Takeaway? Being FOUND is what matters. STAY near HIM and HE will stay NEAR to you. If you have your fists in the air and your arms crossed pouting because you haven’t gotten your way (sounds too familiar I’m afraid), then you are going to live a life (of) hell..(figuratively). But, turn to Him and let HIM love you with open arms, and you will have (not an easy life), but a life filled with PEACE in the midst of the storms.

I couldn’t have received a better message for Jamie’s last dance. It truly hit home for me especially.

Grace is not a transaction.
It’s a gift.

And in these past few years through health struggles, disappointment, rebuilding, slowing down, I’ve had to let go of entitlement in ways I didn’t even know were there.

I’ve had to unclench my fists.

I’ve had to stop measuring my faithfulness by outcomes.

I’ve had to let the Father love me anyway.

Grace.

In a world that screams fairness, comparison, hustle, and earning, grace still stands.

And maybe that is what we crave most.

Not a fair life.
Not an entitled one.
But a life rooted in the steady, undeserved, unwavering love of the Father.

I’ll miss you, Jamie. Thank goodness you will still be a PAL! (Pastor-At Large) (HA!…they gave him a new title as not to lose him completely).

I picked her up early from school on Friday, for we would not be late this time! The buses would leave a bit after 3:30, and she refused to go home first. So, with bags picked before school, she would just wear her school clothes on the bus. This would be her first time going to camp as a TEEN and socially more comfortable since she was back in school.

I already would miss her when we snapped a photo in front of her Bus 7. Praying that she would meet a friend on the bus and in her cabin, I had to trust that God would provide.

They were off, and I got an early text from Tot before she had to put her phone away.

It was now time for The HHH and me to have a weekend. We’d hang out on Friday night watching a movie and just talking. My other prayer was for my health to cooperate so we could enjoy our Saturday.

In the meantime, the bus arrived and we could relax knowing she was probably roasting marshmallows and looking for her hoodie.

Doug and I went to the gym and then headed to Starbucks. It was so nice to not have an agenda but just to talk and share our hearts. Laughing was important as well, right? At each other which we often do..THANK GOD! We both need a little levity. You just HAVE to find the funny in everything or you might as well shoot yourself (or the other person). HA!

The night was fun! We made a yummy dinner, watched a great movie, and hung out with Coopy. Perfect. We also could rest knowing the Tot was in good hands.

My biggest prayer this weekend was for Tatum to have an EXPERIENCE with Jesus. For her to meet Him again. She does believe so deeply, but she even admitted that she needed a tune up. I cannot wait to see her on Sunday.

She’ll come home to some fun gifts from FIVE BELOW, a heart balloon, her three little chickens, and the BIGGEST kiss and hug from me. I missed you Tot!!

She would walk into her room to this!

I love you too, Coopy!

Oh, wait. I love you too HHH.

Curious Coopy. Always.