Hay Happens and Hay's Happen

When I imagined what it would be like to be a mother, I had no idea that it would be so awe-inspiring. Of course I knew it would be a constant quest for “what do I do now”? But much of the time, I use common sense in raising her. Treating her like an adult, she takes in my common sense as I talk to her with reason and love. Responsive, loving, occasionally laughing out loud, and many times crying a bit, she listens. She listens. This has been proven by how she reacts and now behavior.

My weekend goals are this: Make the most of my time with Tatum, but also make sure I continue to include her in what I do! This way, she understands her importance in my life, but she also knows she is not completely in charge 🙂 This means, I try to visit with many people during the weekend, including her in these interactions.

Blue-faced, Saturday began. Blueberries, albeit healthy, are not for the neat freaky type, are they?

Breakfast time (really any eating time) is a bit of a wrestling match, figuratively. “Ba-Ba..Ba-Ba…B-Ba!!!” rolls off her tongue and continues. I have learned to ignore it and remind her that she will have it shortly; she must finish her breakfast. Now, she is FINALLY gladly eating her breakfast, then when she is finished, she hands me her bowl, smiles and says, “Ba-ba?” and “Peeees”. I hand her milk. Wrestling match over. (til the next round at least) The next round is usually where I have to give her an alternative because she can’t have milk all day! (Wrestling match part 2!)

Swim class, next, to fish around. She is graduating to LITTLE SNAPPER 2 now!! Tatum is such a ham as she claps after she goes under…she just loves being the star. Upon this, we went to visit Susan and Jason. Jason is a natural with Tater; she was mesmerized by his side-hat! Still, she won’t let anyone else hold her/carry her, but she will goof around with another.

We always end the day with: A story: Good Night Gorilla is her current fav, a brushing of her teeth with banana brush, a prayer and a kiss. Yes, she kisses me on the lips and smiles!

The next day, Sunday, Tatum found me hiding below her crib as I surprised her with a “Good morning!” We played peek-a-boo with her blanket and then pick out her outfit for church. The silliness continued after breakfast. She discovered a container (well, actually emptied out the container onto the floor) and decided it was a hat.

Pooped, she plopped down on Coti for a rest..yes ON Coti (her pseudo pillow)

Then it’s a pose for her virtual kitchen audience (with Mr. Bear of course also known as “baby.”)

Once we get to church, after singing, we head to the private room, and Tatum can play while mommy listens to the sermon on the TV screen. She shows off that she is a big girl drinking from a cup. I’m no dummy, for it was only water.

 

Then…boom! Onto the pillow for a rest as I comfort herWe spent the rest of the day visiting friends and playing. I relish each minute, even the wrestling events, as we are learning to love, live, laugh, and listen TOGETHER.

 

Every day with Tatum is an investment. I invest in her building character and having a God-loving, people-loving, courageous heart.

This week was a challenge in that endeavor. WHY? Because Tatum was not only overcoming her supposed HFMD, but she was in the midst of developing an ear infection. Little did I know as she cried or fussed every time she was horizontal which meant changing her diaper was a
 thrill. Moreover, for two nights AND nap time, she cried. I had no idea until Marla gave me this clue: her ear hurts! Of course! Upon a visit from the Dr., this was exactly what she had; a right ear infection. Now I know why I had sleepless nights all week. Now I know why I felt like a failure as a mother since she was always crying and I felt like I wasn’t meeting her needs.

One investment we did make was in teaching Tatum how to eat out; could she last an hour eating and playing at the table? The bears were dancing… until our waitress Holly came up to see how she was doing.

Tatum then shared her bear. Sharing…Very kind.

Investing continued this morning, but Tatum took over today. Investing in piggy 🙂 

 

 

 

 

 

The idea is brilliant, and I should have thought of it myself since I am a teacher! Modeling with a picture book. This idea came from a dear person in my life who I deeply respect (and I fellow educator I might add).

So, I am trying to teach Tatum the simple concepts of “please” and “thank you.” I also want her to understand it appropriately and genuinely. I plan to create a picture book of her doing some of the behaviors I desire by snapping a shot of her doing them! Then we can read them together as she sees herself engaging in the sought behavior.

Today was perfect. She loves her gummy vitamins and always asks for “MO MO…” I reached down and said, “Please?” She smiled and then she actually said, “Tank you!” SNAP! We got it on film! (the phone! 🙂

 What happened next, however, was priceless. She handed the gummy to Coti and let him lick it. Then she put it in his mouth!  She never does that, but that was so thoughtful of her. So, we decided to give her a doggie treat to give to Coti since this seemed to be her modus operandi at the moment. She took the dog treat, let Coti lick it, then ate it herself!!!! NO!!! Yuk. We both winced and shook our heads…”Not for Tatum..YUK…” Thank goodness it was a Natural Peanut Butter treat with no weird pig feet meal or odd ingredient. But still…..!

Disease?

By the 3rd day of a fever (average 102.5 degrees), I took her to the Dr. He knew it was a virus, but either it was JUST a virus, or it was hand-foot-and-mouth disease. According to WebMD “it is an illness that causes sores in or on the mouth and on the hands, feet, and sometimes the buttocks and legs. The sores may be painful. The illness usually doesn’t last more than a week or so.” Well, it usually breaks out “within a community.” I figured that is what she as because she continues to touch her tongue and eating must hurt because she gets very fussy. Plus she has a bit of a rash…. One week or so of this and she’ll be fine, but in the meantime, she is one fussy bunny! Poor thing (yes, and poor Tatum too. ) LOL.

But, I figured we would try to go to church today, and she just sat by me reading and trying to stay still.

  It ended up being a bit of a cryfest, although I attempted to comfort her.

  She did cheer up when we saw friends. She is now blowing kisses and saying “BaBa” for ByeBye. The minute we drive around the corner nearing home, she yelps, “Dah-y…dah-y.” Coti awaits her presence too. Home at last.

REVISED!
She did NOT…I repeat..NOT have HFMD. It was just Roseola. Unexciting, but very blotchy.

He was a good man with a big heart and unrealized potential. Yes, he loved me from the moment he saw me.

and at times he even played with mebut being a father was not his forte.

My father’s birthday was today, and sadly, he passed before Tatum was born. Yes, he would have loved her, from afar, and at moments, up close, but I will never know what kind of a grandfather he would be. However, I do know this: He’d say, “Stephanie, I’m proud of you and support you.”

 

Years ago, I used to watch Sports Center. My favorite part was the “Plays of the Week” because it summed up the highlights of the whole game. This week, it was a game of “what can Tatum get into or what can Tatum do that is new and completely different!?” Altogether, it was such an adventure of her simply discovering herself and others.

Here are her Plays of the Week!
1. Going to IKEA with mom and grandma and finding that it is actually much better in the stroller. Once she was allowed a bit of freedom, the maze of people and merchandise overtook her curiosity to seek out.

2. Blowing kisses to Nancy and Connie at the Foster Care lunch hosted at Jan’s house. Tatum mimicked Connie, and then could not stop making kiss noises. This was also the anniversary of the first time I met Nancy (my lovely mentor!)

3. Tatum drank water out of an adult cup today at church. The flabbergasted mother sitting next to me was impressed. So was I. She missed the next minute when she spilled it all over her dress.

 

4. The park AGAIN to ride the train. Tatum took a selfie.

She decided she was ready for the carousel next time as she eyed the horsies. 

5. She has become quite the helper. After going to Trader Joe’s, Tatum helped mommy carry in the groceries. Eggs that were already cooked…I’m no dummy!

After this event, it was about time for bed, and Tatum was already deciding to undress. Not sure if I like this ability in her to whip off her clothes in the middle of the kitchen.

Well, it was a lovely week of Tatum time. Her little personality is growing into a BIG statement. Wherever she goes, she says, “HI” to strangers and smiles at the crowd. My little ray of sunshine is bright.