Through it all….. The LOVE celebration

It’s hard to believe that one year ago today, I sat in a courtroom with a judge telling me I was officially Tatum’s mother, Mrs. Tatum Tot. Each day, I wonder why me? Why did God choose me to be her mommy? Questioning and celebrating coexist in my brain, and this actually produces wonderment. Awesome wonder of HOW God works. It is truly apparent that I had ZERO to do with this miraculous union just as Mary had ZERO to do with the immaculate conception. She did not deserve it; she merely lived her life, obediently and just plain normally. Me? My life was no different (and I am definitely no Mary!) But, for some reason, this child of mine needed someone to figuratively carry her into this world and give her an opportunity to LIVE HER BEST LIFE.

IMG_2075I humbly receive that honor to be her guide ( and hopefully her light, her sage and her biggest cheerleader). All I can do is continue to point point point (and I say that three times to emphasize this since it is not me who can provide this) to the GOD of this universe while also being the GOD of her life; her ABBA; her Daddy; her personal Jesus.

May each year bring the blessings that she continues to provide me. I say this, not because it is and easy road, for blessings do not come from paved ways; they come climbing grassy hills with rocks and crags. We fall; we bruise; and occasionally break a limb, but through it all, we are ultimately blessed.

 

Aging, Staging, Paging

Aging. My face shows it, but my attitude does not. In fact, as I get older (numbers-wise), I feel less omniscient. Not that I felt all-knowing before, but I realize how little I really know; especially when it comes to parenting. Tatum aging humbles me in every way since I am walking along side her as her parent. I need to remain one step AHEAD of this brilliant, quick mind or she becomes the “alpha” and I become the responder. Proactivity, wisdom, and a positive reinforcing nature is what is needed with Tot.

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The BIG DAY was introduced by my dear friend Melissa and her girls, Sophia and Gabbie. They threw me a birthday party with a lovely blue cake to match Tot’s eyes. IMG_4862
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As the week progressed, it continues to become apparent how much Tatum loves to be “on stage.” She loves to be a ham and the center of attention. This can be amazingly adorable OR in the need of a time out.

IMG_4845She’ll show her silly side with the shades; she’ll play with Mr. Big Baby and point to his eyesIMG_4852 IMG_4854 IMG_4855

But not getting her way? Then she’ll stage a full on breakdown; it’s the END of the world!! Whatever is in her hand goes flying, so she loses it for that moment. Now, I’ve added the Time Out for 2 minutes. After that, we talk like two rational people; I treat her as someone who understands what I’m saying and I listen. It’s tough for the moment, but then, she will hopefully learn and extinguish this stagey cagey behavior.

What do I adore now? Her “paging!” through a book. She’ll pick one up and just plop down going through it on her own. IMG_4840 IMG_4847

She loves to point to the various animals and make the noises.. .

 

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Aging…Staging…Paging. (And no more raging!!!) as we journey through this season.

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Mother’s Day Take Two!

Evidence of a fun day!

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After breakfast and Tatum’s curiosity bug biting, she ran around my bedroom and bathroom as I got ready. She of course had to grab my comb and pretty herself too. We are going to have to learn to share our mirror and comb usage. Having a girl has its challenges, eh?

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Strike a pose!

Next stop: Church! But first, a pic with mom. Sadly, I did not get a picture with MY mom 🙁 She got bitten by the bug I had last weekend which I got from Tatum. The tummy holds no prisoners…well actually it does but they wanted out both ends.
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Ok, so I am still carrying her in the pouch. I have a few reasons for this:

1. I like to be close to my Tot. (vs. the stroller)

2. She’s getting heavy (well, relative to the feather she used to be) Plus, I need some support for my aging (sigh) back!

3. I cannot have her running around loosely (especially since she still is a bit wobbly!)

Tatum loves singing at church in my pouch. She loves to hold up her hands and clap with everyone. I embrace her tightly as we praise God and thank Him for all he does for us. (Thank you for my TOT, Jesus) Then, like usual, we head into the room to listen to the sermon. (She did sit through a great video about moms and smiled the whole time. It’s like she understood it!) In our little sanctuary room, she likes to listen and run around, playing with various cups, kleenexes, boxes, pillows. Note: no toys!? (although she has a bunch of them!)

Then….she heard it. She stopped and started to bounce as the music began again. 

IMG_4830 IMG_4827Clap…bounce…clap. What rhythm!

Collapse…Woo!IMG_4832

The rest of the day, we just hung out at home and relaxed. OK…that is not true. Relaxing fell out of my vocabulary for a few years. However, being her mom, relaxing or not, is a whirlwind. When she says, “UP!”, my heart flutters. When she kisses me, I do a happy dance. When she says, “Mama!”, I know I feel like I have her heart too.

IMG_4809This little face..this sweet little face shows wonder, excitement, confusion and individuality. Yes, she is starting to exhibit her large opinion in many non-verbal ways, (shaking head saying NO, pushing things away, laying on the floor turning to the side, and taking swings!) but she is also starting to exhibit her wondrous curiosity with bringing me things I suggest (like a cucumber!) or just wanting me to have something like a book to read.

Sadly, my mom was ill this day, and we will definitely celebrate another day. (What would I do without my mom? She has laid a tremendous foundation for me to be a great mom) Gladly, I got to enjoy a full SECOND Mother’s Day with my dearest Tot.

 

What is it about balls?

My friend Jocelyn and I used to sneak into her brother David’s room and listen to an AC/DC song which pronounced, “I’ve got big balls…” This now has become the theme of my life with now Coti and  Tatum. She has now graduated to her own big blue ball (from a mini rubber one), and it is driving Coti batty.

At Fry’s today, I decided to buy her a ball since I thought it would be fun to play with it in the park. We walked by an enormous bin of multi-colored BIG soft plastic balls, and Tatum yelped, “BALL! BALL! BALL!” My master plan was to purchase one, so she chose the blue one. Sadly, she had to learn the concept of ‘to wait til we get home to play with the large blue ball.’

Success! UNTIL…………..
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Coti saw this ball.

UH OH.

He could not grip this one, and so this challenge became his obsession. This BIG BLUE BALL became the bone of contention (no pun intended), so the lesson in whose ball is whose was the lesson upstairs. Eventually, Tatum gave up and grabbed her old mini rubber ball brought it to me, and proceeded to bring me more baseballs from mom’s collection. Not good. I’ve created ball monsters.

What is it about BALLS???

Modeling vs Telling

Years of teaching and reading many sagacious articles, I’m seeing the power of her copying what I do. This is a HUGE plus IF I’m engaging in positive behavior, so this keeps me constantly aware of what I’m doing and what I’m saying (plus, how I’m saying it.)

When one walks in the room, she says, “Hi!” with a big smile.

When one gives her something, no matter what it is, she gladly says, “Tank ewe!”

When she wants something from the refrigerator, she looks and sees, “Pees!?”

When she accidentally spills her water, she blurts, “Uh oh”, grabs a towel and starts wiping!
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(She wanted to drink out of the cup and not spill, so she tried very hard, then laughed when she spilled a bit. My water bottle is the size of her body, so I gave her the lid to practice)

When I say, please don’t touch that (like my computer), I distract her and celebrate what she is doing instead. (it’s slowly taking effect)

When I want her to put her shoes away, she gladly walks over and puts BOTH away, and the same goes for when I want her to bring me her shoes, book, water…etc. She does it and I greatly rejoice.

Smart girl, this Tatum, and I have to keep up with her. I do put way too much pressure on myself to be perfect, and not make one error in raising her. The beauty about Tatum is she keeps me laughing; her sense of humor and smile melt my heart and keep me in the moment vs. analyzing every little thing. IMG_4760

 

Carpe Diem

 

 

Ears to Nose to Tummy

It’s been a long haul of ear infections, colds, and now, stomach problems. It’s the chicken and the egg theory. Was it the ear infection number one that brought on the cold that brought on ear infection number two? Or maybe ear infection number one never healed and the cold just occurred. Ear infection number two led to Augmentin which led to diarrhea and the 5 upchuckings of egg, banana and milk which led to a lovely odor in the car seat baking in the 100 degree weather. And now? She is getting her molars which is making all of this so much more fun for all of us! So, whatever was the genesis of this whole encounter should feel really bad because this little girl is having a tough go!

I had to pick her up from school since she was sick, and all she wanted to do was relax. Feeling a bit like settling down, she decided to mimic the doggie.
IMG_4751 IMG_4752 IMG_4754 IMG_4755 IMG_4756 IMG_4758He just wanted to comfort her. I am amazed at the amount of love she has for her “dahy.” Her ability to adore and love on something (like her “baby”) shows me her heart. 

The rest of the day it was water water water and lots of hugs. We switched to Omnicef, and based on my experience selling Cephalosporins, I know this is a winner. Preferably, I’d rather her not be on Antibiotics.

Reunited Part 2: The day off

Tatum and me. Just the two of us all day long; this was my goal, and it ended up going superbly.

We had the privilege of having Monday off since the 7th grade trip began on the weekend, and since it was lovely weather, we opted for a morning at the Railroad Park. Let me in!!! 

IMG_4731 IMG_4730She woke up with green goop emanating from her nose, so I was not sure of her stamina. Praying that it was just a passing virus, I opted to try the activities. She has not been on the carousel ride yet, and since the train didn’t come for 1/2 hour, vertical moving horsies it was! Immediately into the ride, she started freaking out! She screamed, “Shoe!” She pointed to the ground and there it was: her other pink Croc….on the sidewalk. Great! Now we go around and around and she sees Shoe…Shoe…Shoe. So much for Kodak moments. She clutched onto Baby the whole time.

IMG_4734 IMG_4735 IMG_4740We arrived home, and she popped the wheelies a few times

IMG_4742, then wanted, “UP!” on my lap so she could work the computer. Not thinking this was a great idea, I put her baby in the bag so she could find it. Again, not such a brilliant idea. She could not find it amidst the large folds in the bag.

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But then TA DA!!! Found it. Hoooray!

Wrapping up the day was a few rounds with Coti and the ball, squeekie hot dog, cow and alligator. He rough houses a bit too much with Tatum, so we are trying to calm him down. At one point, Tatum just got tired of his antics and walked to her bookshelf. She proceeded to bring me a book. Actually, it was a children’s Bible with colorful pictures. She handed me the book then plopped down between my legs. We read about Noah’s ark and she pointed out the elephants, sheep and lions. After reading, I asked her to return the book, please. She gladly put it back on the shelf and brought me another. I was in awe of her responsibility with returning the book to its proper place. Gleefully, I pronounced, “Thank you!” and clapped. (she repeated thank you).

What a gal. What an amazing little bundle of joy.