Category: Soul Care

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10 months and steadfast

“Blessed be the Lord, for he has wondrously shown his steadfast love to me” (Psalm 131: 21). This verse is a stark reminder that God never gives up on His people. Steadfast means resolutely or dutifully firm and unwavering. Another way to say it is committed and constant. As a mother, I now get how God loves me because this is how much I love Tatum. My love for her grows daily, but it is unwavering and never ending. The fact that He can have this much love for me blows my mind, and I often feel so undeserving. However, it is committed and constant; nothing I can do will change that even when I blow it in every way (and often I do).
The last verse of this Psalm says, “Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord.” My strength and might comes from this infused love; this unearned love; this grace-filled love which is bestowed upon me. I pray that Tatum can understand this power of love which comes from her mom and from Him. Nothing she can do or say will ever change the amount of love she has surrounding her.

Entering the double digit of 10 months, IMG_3172

she is a bundle of joy and verve. Her smile is infections and she often makes everyone in the room laugh.

Bless you my little one. May angels surround your life and protect you. May you be filled with kindness and love.

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Conflict Management 101

What? Are we in trouble? Coti and Tatum seem to love the same toys. She only wants this squeaky dragon when Coti is playing with it, and HE only wants her giraffe when SHE is playing with it. Then, they both look at ME to solve this challenge. So, what do I do? Sharing is not an innate quality of either of these lovely children (is it of any?!), so it must be discussed rationally. “Tatum, this is Coti’s dragon. Let’s throw it together!” “Not for Coti; for Tatum; this is your squeaky monster.”

Oy…the joys of motherhood! 🙂

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The Secret?

Last night, we watched an incredible independent movie. It was called The Letter Writer. Hollywood would not have touched this one as it was not flashy or filled with “excitement” via unbecoming behavior. (think Hangover?)

The story begins with a high school girl daydreaming of her career as a rock star. Of course the setting of her dream is her Algebra class which she is currently failing. Also being raised by her single hard-working mom has left her searching for some other role models and ways to find happiness. One day, she receives this letter from an anonymous source describing in detail how she is destined to be great and that she is destined for amazing things. She just must recognize her talents, her gifts and take her failures as a guide for her future. After much searching, she finds that this writer lives in a retirement home. He picks 10 names out of the phone book every day and writes a letter of encouragement. The letter writer, Sam, and Maggy (the girl) form a beautiful friendship. He teaches her the joy of generosity. Sam doesn’t want to waste his elder years, so he has decided to use his words for GOOD. He spends his time giving of encouragement. Generosity begets generosity. She slowly changes in the movie into a phenomenal giver and encourager. She finds the secret to happiness.

Today, in church, this was the message as well. Joy is not a feeling; joy is not due to our circumstances. It is from an attitude we adopt. Joy comes from giving of our time, talents and treasures. I continue to learn this concept of generosity and joy. Man, sometimes, I get so darn down, and if only I can remember that in that time, I turn outward and not inward. Tatum can learn this as well, and she will find the joy in her life. She will get knocked down; she will fail. But, if she can continue to adopt the attitude of gratitude (which produces generosity), she will be a huge success! 🙂

 

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Staying Power

I have planned it well, I must say! We arrive when the music is playing, and Tatum is in AWE! She loves the music and the singing,

Then I feed her while the service begins. This takes a good 15 minutes, and then LAP TIME! She seems to keep it quiet and happy the whole time. God is good. Holy Spirit is in the air and in her 🙂IMG_9292

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Tot time on the mat + Reading!

I’m so enjoying my summer. First, it involves lots of Tot Time!
With this, I tend to be horizontal on her mat as she inserts all of her toys in her mouth. Her latest obsession is my iPhone. However, the other day, she decided to grab the book I was reading to see what it was about.

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IMG_2720This book is a grabber…I must admit! It’s the third book I’ve read this summer. The first one, To Kill a Mockingbird (assigned to my rising 8th graders) was probably the best book I’ve read in ages. Scout’s wisdom and her sassiness makes me want to meet Atticus! On the other hand, I picked up The Breadwinner (since I assigned it to my rising 7th graders for summer reading), and it made me appreciate good writing. How do some of these books get published?

The Fault in Our Stars‘ dialogue among Hazel and Gus cannot be described; it’s wit beyond words. John Greene makes these characters so addicting, one just wants to reach in the book and have coffee with them. How can he do this while characters in a book like Mango Shaped Space fall flat?

So, now, I just started reading Stand Tall by Joan Bauer, and part of me feels like I’m betraying Hazel and Gus from Fault. Isn’t that funny? It’s like you’re married to the characters and you don’t want to leave them!

As I read today, Tot and Coti hang out with me.

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Ten Daily Reminders

Adapted from Matt Reagan

Out of sight; out of mind. The person who came up with this truism, understands the power of faith. What can be the challenging part is how to continue in faith when the feelings subside. Reminders can prompt our faith and can be the engine in our step when we just can’t feel our way out of a desperation. Somewhere between the time I put my head down on the pillow and the time my eyes become half moons, Ihave forgotten some realities which can easily be taken for granted in my daily life.

God told Joshua to erect 12 stones as reminders to what He has done. God gave us rainbows to remind us that He shall never flood the earth again; a promise. We need tangible items to keep us walking straight and believing in the unseen. So, I hang these up as to remember.

I have “borrowed” these ten from Mr. Reagan, but I have added commentary under each one as an application for myself.

1)    God exists. (Exodus 3:14; John 8:58)

It may not feel like it sometimes. I tend to focus on my list for the day; my tasks. The last thing I ponder is the ultimate existence of an infinite, loving, in-control God. But He is the one who is completely in charge. I submit to His will for the day and for my list.

2) God loves you. (Romans 5:8; John 16:27; Jeremiah 32:40–41)

Seriously? Me? When I know I’m loved and adored by my Creator, this changes how I talk to myself and how I treat others. I don’t’ need to perform perfectly and I don’t need to be accepted by everyone. He loves me, and sometimes that has to be IT.

3) Jesus died for you, and the Father has now bound himself to give you only good things. (Romans 8:28; Romans 8:32)

Jesus died on a cross. This is the truth. But, how he died and why he died is what is important. He died to pay for all of our sins….mine too. He died to give me another helper, The Holy Spirit. He died and suffered so I won’t have to. He died so I can have acceptance from God NOT through my efforts. Furthermore, the cross signifies that even the most difficult of trials will come to me as blessing, for my ultimate good, no matter how I feel.

4) God sees you as perfect. (Hebrews 10:14; 2 Corinthians 5:21)

But I’m not. I’m filled with anxiety, sometimes pity, and egocentricity. Nothing I do will change how God sees me. Jesus gave His life so His righteousness (and perfection) could be imputed to me (or put into my bank account)  again, regardless as to how I feel. I’m a work in progress and God loves me with my bumps and bruises.

5) That is because of Jesus’s perfection, not yours. You deserve hell. (Romans 3:10; 1 Timothy 1:15)  Key: I’m not perfect so my flesh cannot take claim for some of the things I do well. It’s on loan from God (as Rush would say.)  Next, I must have gratitude and live that way. I deserve what I deserve. Without Jesus sacrifice, I’d be condemned. nothing I can do will change that. Thank you, Father for saving me.

6) You will die. (James 4:14, Hebrews 9:27) So I cannot fear death. It is inevitable. Make each day count, because one cannot know when his/her day is the last.

7) You will live forever in the new heavens and new earth. (Romans 8:18, Hebrews 10:34) But, I don’t fear death because of the promise of the life to come. Live like it’s real because Heaven is.

8) For now, you are an exile on the earth. (Hebrews 11:13–16) I know I’m different. I know not all will accept me. My convictions for my faith make me different. However, my identity is in me being a daughter of the King..not as a citizen of this earth. I will never feel like I fit in, and that is OK.

9) Nothing on earth is truly worth putting your hope in. (Jeremiah 2:13; Galatians 6:14) Which is why I don’t put my hope in the earthly things because they will disappoint always.

10) You have no right to be unhappy. (Philippians 4:4; 1 Peter 1:8–9) Sure, I can be sad for whatever reason, but I must focus on what is lovely, good, positive. My attitude is just that. It’s not a truth.

Reading these everyday will keep me grounded. I will be down and sad at times, but if I focus on these truths, nothing will keep me down.