Easy? NO. Important? YES

If we did (or did not (do)) everything we felt like doing, then life would be so EASY! Would it be fruitful? Nope. Would it grow us? Nope. Would it be good role modeling? Nope.

However, having a toddler is not a job. It’s not one that ends when you get home or when you go to bed at night. Even when your toddler is not with you, it’s still a job, and you’re still on “the clock.” I’m convinced that yoga pants and scrunchies were made by a mom and developed for moms. You can always spot a mom when you are out and about because she will look like she just came from the gym yet probably has not worked out in months. We just look lovely!

Here’s the difference, however. We need to be ON all the time. It’s really much like teaching in that I must have that smiley, positive attitude even when I just don’t feel like it. At least with teaching though, you can go have lunch with your buddies or hide in your classroom. Not so with parenting.

Just yesterday, I was T..I..R..E..D and just did not want to be the entertainment committee for Tatum. She decided I needed some coffee: 
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IMG_5283 IMG_5287Sweet child shared it with me after she gulped it down. I need to teach her about sipping (not chugging the hot liquid)

It did not get easier through the day either. She likes to say “NO” and “MINE.” (I know..something new in toddlerland) and this just makes life so pleasant. I must (like teaching) “think on my feet” and be creative because I will not battle this child every time she says “no” which is too many to count.

Spelling gets her attention because she knows many letters. I figured I’d stay away from the N..and the O although she does know the individual sounds, just not the spelling! Amazingly she knows the vowels and of course D (DOG!), J (JUMP!), and T (TATUM).
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The beauty of parenting (like teaching) is that it is all trial and error. Sometimes what I do works magically! And others? FLOP! That is when I walk away for a “MTO” (Mommy Time Out) so I don’t yell.

The day actually ended beautifully with the cuddling...and why??? My attitude adjusted. Before going “UP” to bed, I sat at the bottom of the stairs and just talked to her like an adult. I shared how much she meant to me and a little tidbit about when I was her age. Then we scooted on upstairs to a nice bedtime bonanza. (Because lately, bedtime is not so delightful).

Feelings: They are pretty powerful, but so is our ability to use a toddler strategy: SAY  ” NO” to how you feel and Y. E. S. to being positive despite feeling _____  (blah).

I love you, Tot.



 

My non-cuddling little cuddler

Don’t ever label your child. I did it.
“She hates to cuddle;” She’s not a hugger;” Tatum hates to rock with me.”

Guilty as charged!

What has happened warms my heart. Tatum Knight puts her arms around me and really hugs! Is it a coincidence that she started putting her arms around me in August (one month ago)? I do not think so. This is exactly the time I decided to come home and BE HOME with her full-time. Now, daily, I get hugs.

Tonight, before I put her in bed, I rocked her in my chair and she cuddled with me. As I did, we prayed (well, I prayed out loud) and then I sang to her (poor child). Then, I put her in bed. Usually, I just put her down and pray over her in bed as she listens, but tonight?… We rocked and so did it!

My little angel. My sweet little angel.

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His child

Holding Tatum in my arms today during the singing at church, I couldn’t help but weep. The Spirit of God overcame me as my body filled with goose bumps and my eyes flooded with tears. Tatum heard me sing out to the Lord and as I did, I held her closer. She is my gift…my precious present that I lift up to HIM daily.

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She got it this morning, as she actually comforted me as I held her. She could sense His Spirit moving me. As my dear friend Dick said, children really do sense God; Jesus even tells us to have that childlike faith. I sense she has that even at 21 months. How does she know to be silent every night as we pray before bed? So many little clues of her precious faith; the kind Jesus wants us all to have.

The rest of the service reminded me of how blessed I feel to know the women of City of Grace. Elizabeth is one of them, and it is no coincidence that she used to work with my mom. We have playdates with her adorable little 2-year old, and we both think they’d be a tremendous couple in 30 years when I allow her to start dating. Good thing I have her husband picked out, so she won’t even need to date! 🙂

When we arrived home, the doggie couldn’t wait to throw the ball and play.

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Then as we went upstairs, I realized I needed to go back down and talk to my mom. As I did this, Tatum took it upon herself to go into her room, grab three books off her shelf and go into my room and read. Again…”coincidentally” she picked the ONLY three bible books she has. Weird. Just crazy amazing.

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 Tomorrow is Labor Day, and I shall celebrate this LABOR OF LOVE that God has bestowed upon me.

Crashing the class

Panic-stricken. Yes, this was me at the start of this SAHM journey. What could we do all day every day?

This is when I looked at resources. They are out there, you just have to look. Little did I know how valuable they would be for Tatum’s development (and me as well as I learn how to teach her!)

It started with swimming when she was only 6 months old. I did not necessarily do this for her development, but more for us to bond and do something together. Since then we have continued. She has gained (besides swimming skills):
1. Listening to instructions (she may fight it, but then we have a lil chat on the side of the pool)

2. Being with other children and “playing nice”

3. Patience and waiting your turn.

4. Being silly and having fun.

We added Little Gym in the summer, but I decided to remove her from this, not only because it was costly, but because it was too unstructured, too large of a class, and parents did not enforce their children to be polite and listen to the instructor. It was terrible modeling for Tatum.

I now have added Musicology on Fridays. This class is terrific in that it is more intimate, structured and it teaches her rhythm, movement, and SHARING! Also, the mommies seem to model listening, following directions, and being polite. BONUS.

The rest of the week, I have now been trying to figure out what is best. The library is a little known FREE secret. Here is what we have tried:

1. Story Time: Excellent only if the parents would model for the kids to stay seated when the lady is reading.

2. Shake Rattle and Roll: Pure movement and fun. A bit of looseness that Tatum needs, and I don’t worry about the structure.

3. TODAY: we crashed the TODDLER TIME class (you have to be 24-36 months): This was excellent because the kiddos had to stay in their little letter square. Tatum had the “D” for “Dog” as I hoped it would keep her sitter sitting! I loved how strict the instructor was with the kids in staying put. The parents also modeled so well, and Tatum got to see that it was polite to pay attention and yet NOT GET UP.

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It worked for the most part, but then…IMG_5276

I had to reel her in. I think after coming a few times, she is going to learn this. More importantly, I am preparing her for her days in school. It’s a pure pleasure and HONOR to be in her life at this age. Had I known what I was missing, I would have done this earlier (although I don’t know how I could have!)

We will continue to hit the library with their FABULOUS preparatory,  FREE, and FUN classes.

Again, Thank you FATHER for allowing this time with my little TOT. We are bonding and she is growing into a lovely young girl (with a precious heart.)

 

Can gratitude erase stress?

Gratitude can overtake one’s life just as easily as stress. The stressors of anyone’s life are only as heavy as one allows them to be. The conversation this morning discussed stomach aches. It occurred to me that ever since I can remember, I have been plagued with all types of stomach problems. Whether it is slicing cramps, bloating, nausea or just plan doubling over aches, I’ve been there done that a million times over. Who knows whether the root cause is dairy, gluten, fruits, the way the planets are aligned or my big toe. The commonality which has always been present in my life is stress, right? Isn’t that the norm for all of us?

So what is different now? I still have stress! Shoot, I have a 21-month old child who I adore with all my heart and soul. However, the gratitude I have for this ULTIMATE GIFT supersedes any stressor I have ever experienced. Stomach aches? Sure, they are still present. But now, they are not as bothersome. My focus is on HER.

Today was one of those days where you think, how do I deserve this amazing child?

She sat at her table reading her Jesus Loves Me book as I sat in another chair working on my laptop.
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The spurts of her playing independently are getting longer every week. Then she opened her little doll case which I filled with various buttons and boxes. This kept her going for oh…about 3 minutes! A lifetime in Tatum years.

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Then, back to more books but now on her green chair. This time? A “where is it?” book. This one was her infant book and she has rediscovered it.

IMG_5262She then discovered her new toy which I spent literally one hour airing up…Mr. Panda. This was to be her new pool toy, but I caught her sitting on it doing….what do you think?? YEP. Reading her favorite book. (I Love You Forever)

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When she first met Mr. Panda, she looked at him square in the eyes, said “Hi,” and kissed him. She seems to kiss everything to show she likes them. This will work for at least now, or if she moves to France.
After the library and “Shake, Rattle, and Roll” class we headed home for her to play in her kitchen and relax a bit.

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It was the perfect Tatum day, and we made it all together. Together. This is why gratitude overflows in my being.

An answer to prayer 21 months later

A community

A bible study.

All answered in one day.

Thank you, MOTC. (Mom’s of the City).

This amazing group of women (all mommies) meet twice a month on Tuesday mornings. They provide child care, food, fellowship, and so much encouragement. Now that I get to be home with Tatum, this provides something ALL MOMS need. When working, you just have no time for anything like this. If you did attend a group, it takes away from “quality time” and that cannot happen when you need every minute together.

Then, to my utter surprise, on the alternate Tuesdays, there is a women’s bible study WITH child care as well.

I get fed.

The ladies in the child care center were in awe of Tatum; they said she was like no other child. She is AWARE and so mature. I just know I’m blessed beyond belief to have her and ….

now to have a community to encourage and be encouraged by.

Thank you, Father!!