Category: SAHM I am

Every day after we eat, Tatum likes to sit on Coti’s place and cuddle with Coti and me. Today, she decided to cuddle just with Coti. However, Coti is a bit confused. Where is Tatum’s head?
She happened upon the hat that she had on when she was born; it was in a box under her bed, and it fascinated her. Actually all of her baby things thrill her lately. (Note the monkey socks) Ironically, when she was a baby, she removed anything from her feet. Now? All the time. Socks..socks..socks. Baby ones of course.
The hat she found is so appropriate for today, because it was 2.5 years yesterday she entered this world and TWO years TODAY that she became officially my Tot.

This little Tot had her teeny head covered with this striped cap. Now? Tatum’s brain is maturing into reading stories of rainbows,
and her spirit grows as a little jokester who loves to have fun..hat and all.

This wondrous child continues to keep me in AWE.

When the number on the chronological time line of my life counts up one, I tend to get reflective. In fact, I ponder what my life has added up to in these 36  years.

I would say it’s chugging along quite nicely. Tatum discovered this choo-choo in front of this vintage store by her music class. It’s now a necessary stopping point. This day, in particular, she made a great discovery. When she pushed the button, the train started to move and whistle.

 

 

It was then that she perked up and started to really steer the engine. How did she miss this button before? And, what if she had missed it all along?

She would have stayed still.

Idle.

Silent.

But no, she reached for the button and pressed it on faith that it would awaken the choo-choo and liven up her life.

Until Tatum came along, I was moving very fast. In fact, I was moving so fast, I never stood still long enough to hear God’s voice. But, for some reason, Tatum has given me the opportunity to get back on the train and push that button. However, this time, I’m not moving fast, I’m enjoying the ride.

This ride I’m on now is giving me new opportunities. For one, to be a parent. Not just a mommy, but a  parent who is guiding her child into the wisdom of life. What she does in return is teach me to take it slower and enjoy the ride. It does not last long.

Next, this ride is giving me flexibility to be in the career I love without the tight strings. Teaching and working within the educational world gives me energy! I can still make a difference but in a new way: empowering, encouraging, and educating teachers. What a blessing.

Finally, this ride is given me a chance to grow in being the woman God wants me to be.

This little Tot of mine; I’m going to let her SHINE!

 

My doll. My Tatum. I don’t regret ONE SECOND of being with you all day everyday. You truly light up my life and make me laugh out loud. You also are the music in my step.

In music class, you have rhythm and share your instruments. 


You also have curiosity and a mind like a parachute. It’s always open and ready to balloon out. I won’t let it pop, Tot. I’ll keep finding things that inspire, grow, and encourage you. 

Lately, you have become a little cuddler and my heart sings with joy. Mary adores you!
I love you more than I thought was ever possible.

 

Tatum loves to say this, but she is also proud that she is mastering the waiting game. If she can at this age, she’s ahead of the rest of the world. For me, “waiting is not easy,” as Gerald and Piggie have portrayed. 

Why is it so hard? Sometimes, you don’t know if what you are waiting for will even happen! You just go on faith. Or, maybe, it won’t be what you expect! But, you stomp your feet in hopes it will happen, and that still small voice says, “You will have to.” Spoken like a true sage, that Piggie!

Well, God knew all along that Tatum would be a cuddler, but He did not let me in on this secret. I used to watch the mommies in swim class (with envy!), and their LO would wrap their arms around the mommy so she wouldn’t have to hold as strongly. I wondered if it was a female/male issue, but nope. Little girls cuddled with their mommies too. When I would carry her, her arms would flow freely, not touching me. Even as a baby, she did not want to be really cuddled and held tightly. It KILLED ME, but I did not take it personally. I read somewhere by another mommy that her LO all of a sudden wanted cuddling when she was 3. I had to wait. Waiting is hard. It’s hard to wait..it’s not easy. What if it never happened?

Sometimes I ask Tatum what she wants to do. Lately, she says, “I want to cuddle.” At first, I thought she was saying she wanted to ‘color.’ Nope. Then I asked, “You want to cuddle your babies?” NO! She wanted to cuddle with ME! Now, it’s an everyday occurrence. Even yesterday on  our walk, she pronounced as we walked doggie, “Mommy, I want to cuddle!”

So, now, she wraps her arms around me and says, “This is my mommy!” I melt.

It is worth the wait. 
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12

I love you little Tot.

 

 

What happens when we stop running through free flowing fountains and playing hide and seek?

We grow up. Tatum is my reminder to STOP and just RUN!!! Get wet, already!

What makes this even better? A friend! And what else? Super heroes!
Nicholas and Tatum are superheroes. They represent that invincible can-do attitude that grown-ups seem to grow out of. Is it possible to stay a superhero and yet be “grown up?” Is it possible to stay in a free-spirited frolicky  phase while still maintaining a somewhat organized, responsible life?

Tatum reminds me, YES. We can grow up, but not OUT OF!

She sees the little things; her excitement grows over the tiniest of details such as a ladybug or a bird’s wing. She continues to soak in every second of the day with superhero strength and invincibility.

Her friend, Gavin, makes her life even more special. This superhero of a boy is smiles without end. His five-year old hand holds Tot’s and he guides her down the slide. Sometimes, mini superheroes need bigger ones to guide them and coach them.
Tatum teaches me, and others are teaching Tatum. Fun-filled frolicking with friends is what being a superhero is all about. Grown up or tiny.

 

Robert, Tatum’s little friend, is taking Tatum for a walk. Kindly he holds her hand, walks slowly so she doesn’t trip and hurt her toe, and he allows her to be farthest from the street. Shoot. I’m in love. If only I could bypass the dating stage and graft Robert into her future. She’d be set, and I’d be saved from the drama of puberty and discovering boys. Wouldn’t that take the cake!?

After playing with the hose and “kindly” squirting each other (ha), they snuggled in their very own towels. Robert decided to give her some space as she dried off only to tackle her later in his toddler bed. Hmmmm. Never thought I’d say those words about my child…being tackled in a boy’s bed. Luckily, his Thomas pillow protected her, and Robert had to deal with Jennie’s and my unfavorable expressions. He’s a hoot!..Together, they are a hoot and more than a half!

 

It was a small class today. Only one other kiddo in Naomi’s class today, and Tatum had full attention! Naomi had her try the back float, and I usually hold her head, but today!!?? We sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (10 seconds) as I let go and she floated.
This face represents a tired Tot but a brave girl whose mommy is proud!