Hay Happens and Hay's Happen

It was all planned out. Our day usually is.

We were to go to the gym, get our haircuts, run home to get some lunch, then go to gymnastics. After nap, probably just play.

Did it go that way? Not at all, and that is what made it so special.

The gym went fine, and we got out of there rushed and ready for our haircuts. Well, hurry up and wait. When we arrived at the salon, Kristen was not there yet, and the owner gave me a cup of coffee and Tatum a big piece of paper to draw and write on. After about 15 minutes, we needed to find many activities to keep her busy. We exhausted the magazines, went through my bag of toys, and chatted with the staff. Finally 35 minutes later, Kristen showed only to have another appointment in 15 minutes. Luckily, Tatum got her haircut first, and I got a quick 15 minute cut which is usually one hour. However, Kristen gave me full ear and we dished about our lives. It was needed. Tot sat on my lap, and enjoyed every minute. At one point, I had tears and she stuck her little ring in my mouth as to soothe me. Ha!

So, as we sat there, we found out gymnastics was full, so that went out the window. Man, she was so upset, so I needed to make up for it. What was left to do was….up in the air! As we drove home, I made a quick U’turn and stopped at the duckies. It was time..yes, to feed those little critters. So what if it was 114 degrees out! We soaked it up.

When we got home, she and I enjoyed “something different” for lunch, which is the usual request. Turkey rollups with cilantro and tomatoes…and then upstairs. Finally, I sat on her rocking chair as she played, and next thing you know it, we read for 45 minutes!

It was one of those days where the plans of no plans or plans changing turned out to be the best plans!

After nap, we plopped at the table, and we both drew pictures. She wanted me to draw her babies, so I took the challenge. We also wanted to go swimming since she got her new “gobbles” in the mail! But…115 degrees. 

We dished about the day, told penguin stories, jumped up and down, played ball, threw the ball, and played with Coti.

“I love you mommy! See you in the morning!” This is how my day ended. The best plan was this unplanned day.

Every day!! It all started after breakfast. She put a little plastic cup on each hand. Now, did you know that cups can become gloves? She then ran upstairs to grab a ball so she could play catch with her “gloves.” Awkward as it was, she continued to try. Perhaps they work better as hats? Of course. Party hats. “Let’s celebrate, Coti,” she proclaimed as she put on cup/hat on him and one on her. Celebrate? Glove? Then she wanted to have a conversation. Conversation? She picked up her pretend phone and wanted to then order some ink. Ink? Huh? Words are flowing out her mouth I did not know she had. My child has blossomed into a creatively-thinking chatterbox. (and shopper too)

Before we left for music class, however, she needed to do some shopping in my closet. She actually told me this, and proceeded to enter. She also told me she was going to take her friends. Her feet came out flooded in my shoes. I wonder where she gets this love for shoes? Hmmm..

But we still couldn’t leave until she played a game. The “game” is put the pieces in order for Jack and the Beanstalk.

 

Then music class. Her friend Max was there! We have not seen our dear friend Max in ages. He is now a bit past two and a solid adorable little guy. His mom is amazing too, as she and her hubby just adopted another baby, Libby. It was beach day, and this meant lots of “sand” and fun times with the ball. 

Of course the train after, but she took over the wheel, until I asked her to share. Who’s in charge?

 

Recently I was with a group of women, and we were asked to go around and tell something interesting about ourselves. Being last, I had time to think. Hmmm. Interesting about me?

Well, the most interesting thing about me is how I’m learning how to be Tatum’s mom. It used to be I’d walk in a room and people would notice say, “Hi Steph!” Now, I’m just a shadow, because this amazing little wonder derives all of the energy and focus onto her. (no complaint here!)

 

Her fascination with hanging or jumping is a strive to become taller and bigger. Her “no fear” attitude continues to inspire me. Honestly, I want to continue to remind her how brave she is and how much she can conquer!! (with God’s loving Hands holding her of course)

 

 

I also want to help her “stay in the sandbox,” BUT also be able to experience new ventures with new friends and new experiences. Her boldness in being so outgoing, talkative and friendly can be so powerful, and just needs to be channeled in a positive direction.

So, interesting? Yes, I’m fascinating WITH this wonderful ball of energy and fun.

 

Is it possible to get your kid to WANT to obey? I’m on a quest to find out.

Reading this blog has given me many insights:
http://store.notconsumed.com/2014/05/30/teaching-children-to-want-to-obey/

The author, Kim Sorgius, says, “As I continue to watch more and more kids rebelling against rules and parental authority, I notice one big missing link: the why behind obedience. I see it in adults, as well. Let’s take speeding for example. Do we stay under the speed limit out of willful submission? Or do we slam on the breaks when we see the cop car over the horizon? Do we obey the law because it’s right? Or just to stay out of trouble?”
She makes three points:
1. Obedience shows that you believe.

2. Obedience shows love.

3. Obedience is a witness to others.

What kind of person do you want to be? Do you want to be a witness for love or a witness for rebellion? “It’s important to me that they understand that every single choice they make is influential in the life of those around them.” I love how she says: “When we disobey God, parents, and/or authority, we are either influencing a Christian in a negative way or showing a non-Christian that we don’t take God very seriously. Either one isn’t what we are aiming for as God’s children.”

 

Gosh it’s hard. It’s hard for me as an adult, but how do we teach the HOW? She notes that that is the  second step. “Little children do not even have the power to obey. They will always fail. It’s through salvation in Christ that we get the power to obey. (1 peter 1:3)” Yes, we will fail, but instead of getting flustered, we have to ask for the Spirit to work in us to guide us. She has her kids pray prayers like, “God help me to obey when I get mad” or “God help me to listen to your voice when I’m heading down the wrong path.”

Such strong words of advice for bringing up Tatum, and gosh, helping me be a better follower of Christ. I mess up daily, and need to be reminded that I need His help. I can only model this for Tatum as I fail too. It’s in Him that we have success in this life.

 

 

Have you ever gone to the mailbox, grabbed your mail, and noticed it was just a bunch of junk or bills? The same stuff every day. Bills and fliers.
Well, not today! One of the fliers/notecards in the mailbox was actually a check for $1.89 from a settlement from Dreamfields Pasta. Now, I had to remember how I would even get such a check but at one point I did by some black bean pasta from this tiny company, and I guess some type of lawsuit must have occurred because now I have this buck 89 in my mailbox! Eating alternative pasta pays off.

The second envelope was from my insurance company. Great…another bill. Nope! It was a check for $14.44 due to overpayment. Love when that happens!

All this to say, I am thankful. I’m thankful for junk mail and bills because sometimes tuckered away inside all of them is a little treasure.

This is like LIFE. There is muck and mire. Problems and challenges. Junk and bills. Frustrations and foibles. In the midst of it all are treasures of flowers, opportunities, and joys.

Today, I watched Tatum attempt to ride her tricycle and I started to weep inside. I somehow have missed her growing up so fast! Has it just flown by? I need to treasure it more! Treasure the teeny moments in the day when I notice a new curl on her head

Or how she wears her hat which overtakes her head.

 

Or the roses that blossom in the front yard, that SHE notices! (because I was too focused on getting in the house or a task completed)

 

Now what I am noticing is how she is growing in her ability to just be a little student. She decided to write her name on her Tot Notebook but first she needed to color the tree
M today became the focus because she just needed to be a monkey all morning. I attempted to model how to draw the M..Up down, up down..I can do it myself!

Treasured that statement as I know she sure wants to, and I want her to be independent! But I kinda don’t… (:-( )

Onto shapes, and she insisted she would do the oval, circle and triangle.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tot school is pretty forgiving because she is gaining confidence in being successful with her writing tools. Within the day of a bit of crying and whining, there is much treasure to be found. And Tatum? Sure she cries a bit too! (:-). But more importantly, it’s so easy to get flustered with the little moments of outbursts or frustrations.

It’s all about focus.

Treasuring every single minute of every single day.

 

Tot cannot be away from the little guy. He of course is asking for space.

Today, she chased him around with the leash and said, “Let’s go for a walk, Coti.” He continued to give me that look. Mom, can you do something about this?

Since that attempt failed miserably, she figured she’d read to him. He again needed his space, so…

She hopped up on the chair and he laid there just listening.

Besties. It’s a love/hate relationship.

 

I was never a reader.

It wasn’t until I got into graduate school, that I realized the joy of reading. Not the reading of textbooks, but the opportunity to escape with a good book. I also found that I could learn a whole heck of a lot with the knowledge from OTHER people besides my peers and teachers. There was a whole world out there to explore and discover, and it could be done in books.

Next, I heard this. “Readers are Leaders.” It has been noted that business giants are avid readers. According to a Harvard Business Review article, Steve Jobs, Phil Knight (Nike), Winston Churchill were all avid readers. Also, business leaders believe that “deep, broad reading cultivated in them the knowledge, habits, and talents to improve their organizations.” This article also discussed that getting yourself in the books makes you more intelligent through “a larger vocabulary and more world knowledge in addition to the abstract reasoning skills.” ( https://hbr.org/2012/08/for-those-who-want-to-lead-rea/) This jives with my anecdotal experience.

So, what does this have to do with Tatum?

My original intent on having her read was a bonding experience. It gave me a chance to get to cuddle with her at night and share a story, even if it was for 5 minutes which was the best I could hope for at one. She couldn’t sit still and hated to cuddle. Now, at 2 and 1/2, she cuddles up to me many times a day, and we share a book.

My goals with her now are not only bonding time, but an opportunity to teach some character skills, or to share a laugh, to learn a thing or two, or just to enjoy the use of imagination without any need for electronic stimulation.

She now enjoys sitting and reading on her own, and often, reading to me!

I decided to look at the books we are recently enjoying. She often comments that she needs more room for her books! I tend to buy books more than I buy milk, and it is getting a bit out of hand. Thank goodness for used book stores and Goodwill!

We always start the day with Day to Day which is a daily devotion. She then sometimes pulls out another book of prayers. At night, there is a blessing book we read as well.

No two days are alike, and whenever possible, she is pulling out a book, or I am finding one to share with her.

For a little silliness and sing-songy humor, Boynton takes the prize.

Mo Willems makes me laugh louder than Tatum! Great lessons and lovable characters that Gerald and Piggie!

Of course, these board books are favorites. Board books are a great start for any child until they understand NOT to tear the pages. This takes training! It’s also easier on their little fingers. 

The Jesus books are so much fun, and she has internalized Jesus being in her heart. Debby Anderson does such a fine job with the rhythm in these for memory.

Wishing and Waiting. Patiently.

Two more great travel favorites. One with a strong message about perseverance, and one that just teaches them about traveling!

And then there came Thomas. Need I say more? If you have an 18-36 month old….just get to know him. What a fine character with a spectacular vocabulary. 

And luckily next door we have a train park which we can learn about!

That brings me to Elmo. Yep, he has books. Many many books which teach lessons and for some reason, SHE LOVES HIM! We barely even watch the show, but that little red monster makes her laugh.

ABC. 123. Gotta have these!

!

More funny and more silly, and there is an actual plot in each… Dr. Seuss and Eastman.

Classics. That Little Red Caboose gets my vote for hero. And…don’t run away or the fox will eat you. (good advice for that Gingerbread Boy) I tend to remind her of this when we are in the store. 

Bob, Larry and the other Veggies make learning about God fun..and how to be kind! Just love these little books to cuddle with:

Then where…oh where is the…..!? Engage her in the book!

It’s Clifford..Clifford. Lovable and adorable. Teaches excellent lessons while being one big goofy dog. Thomas, Elmo, Clifford, and yes…add Minnie Mouse. Her fascination comes from ??? Clueless. 

Now, add a huggable little bear named Pooh, an adventurous little girl named Dora and her friend Boots, and you’ve got some great plots, strong character lessons, and imagination fodder!

Want to add more silly? These books take a pig, a dog, a mouse, or a moose, and personifies them in the most fun way!Being responsible, sharing, appreciating differences, being kind, and doing your dishes after you eat, and of course being careful about what you take that is not yours…these are all nice lessons to read about.

Tatum will soon see that she is MORE special because she was prayed for and wanted.

And so we cuddle up more at night with these bedtime favorites. 

Truly picture books are not only beautiful, they have great plots and wonderful lessons. Many of these stories are about being grateful of who God made you to be. 

And more about being thankful along with how wonderful it is to read…especially on Mommy’s lap!
Tot can tote books too! 

Or just read a magazine and find the hidden pictures. Sitting in the dentist office, I used to love these magazines because they had great stories, puzzles and games. 

 I love this quote from Charlie Munger: “In my whole life, I have known no wise people who didn’t read all the time – none, zero. You’d be amazed at how much Warren(Buffett) reads – at how much I read. My children laugh at me. They think I’m a book with a couple of legs sticking out”. (http://www.georgeambler.com/leaders-need-daily-reading-habit/)

Tatum has the world at her feet, and her opportunities can be endless; all I can do is give her this potential (by developing her love of reading), love her unconditionally, and …….love her even more!