Tatum has been BBBBBBF (best best best….friends) with Charlotte since last year. They were inseparable.
This year, Tatum gets into the car daily with a little story of how Charlotte ignored her or didn’t want to play with her. For example, they play kickball daily, and today, Charlotte told Tatum to go on the other team. Then the other team said they didn’t want her on their team but to go back to Charlotte’s team. She ended up leaving the game because she felt not wanted. Charlotte really hurt her feelings. This isn’t new. It happens daily. Tatum is never mean back. In fact, she asked Charlotte if they were still best friends.
Well, this just breaks MY HEART as I hear these things. I know there are two sides, but I did witness Charlotte ignoring Tatum when she excitedly approached her in the morning. Ugh….girl drama is starting, and I cannot protect her from it. Oh, that her heart would never be hurt or wrinkled. However, this will help her to grow. Her sensitive heart is so much like mine! It’s a blessing and a curse to have such a sensitive heart. (You get hurt a lot, but how can I teach her that it might not be personal or that this might not be a real friend?)
In the car, I tried not to lecture about friendships. I just empathized. I did say, however, that a real friend is a friend at all times. (Tatum had shared that during the day, Charlotte will be her best friend, and then ignore her the rest; it’s like a friendship built on sand, not rock) Tatum, maybe give her space?
THEN IT HAPPENED> She said, “Mommy, on Monday, I’m going to come up with a game and see if anyone wants to play.” SHE IS BEING A LEADER AND NOT LETTING THE HEARTBREAK CONTROL HER.
She brainstormed the game and came up with Simon Says Get your Wiggles Out.
That night, Daddy had the idea that she have a prop of some sort to make it fun. Tatum thought a remote or a phone would be fun. The one who is “IT” would have to hold the device and use it for leading the group. So I provided the cardboard, and she got to work.
Ok, then we practiced. I encouraged her not to tell the kids that she was in charge. Allow others to be “IT,” and don’t be the boss of everyone. Make it fun for everyone.
So she practiced how she would get the kids to play and then we practiced.
Cooper did great following the Simon Says prompts.
Tatum, you are learning so much. Humans are human, and sometimes you’ll get hurt. Just don’t be mean back. EVER!! Think how Jesus would respond; continue being YOU and don’t let anyone steal your spirit. Just YOU be a good friend, and I promise the friends you make will respect you and will be friends back. I love you and am so proud of you.