August 22nd, 2012, a phone call changed my life forever.
Do I want to a child? Do I want a newborn baby? Is that a question you can answer without tons of prayer and consideration? However, if you say “No, thank you,” then will it be a regret for the rest of your life? I coulda…. I shoulda….. What if I….. Haunting questions.
When I dreamed about being a mother, it was a far fetched vision, because I was never in the right situation to be a parent. A child needs a mother and a father; these thoughts pervaded my mind as I grew up under a single parent. Then, when I got married, I knew we would be parents. But time kept ticking away, and the marriage slowly disintegrated. Hence, the dream of being the 1/2 of a parental unit faded fast. Being single in your 30’s, you decide that it will just happen in God’s time; you don’t even question its possibility; you just know it will happen.
The pool of candidates to date drained fast, and boyfriends came on strong. Some were more close to the “one” than others, but I clung to hope. It had to happen! How could it not?
Fast forward to the fffff.ffff.ffff…forties. What? I’m what? Marriage was much more of a possibility with some of the nice guys I started to date. But being a mother? Hmmmm. Not so much. Those darn eggs expire much sooner than our male counterpart’s parts. Also, most of the men are either already fathers or have no desire to be one. My dream shifted; Perhaps I’d be a great stepmom! Yes, that is perfect. I will step in and be that “other” parent. How complicated could it be? It was not His plan at this time.
When a relationship ended about two years ago with a man who wanted no children, I had a wake up call. This mom thing is not going to happen the old-fashioned, traditional way. It’s going to require me to take some action and then let God figure out the results. Around February of 2012, a dear friend opened my eyes to the concept of fostering a child. Now, for some reason, deep down, adopting a child had ALWAYS been something I desired to do someday. In my opinion, taking in an unwanted child is the greatest form of love; he/she is TRULY chosen and WANTED! So, I began the process of researching this; it was only in the genesis of this process did THE phone call in August occur.
And so it began…the adoption process. I think it is good that I had NO idea how much work the process can be because I probably would have thought I could not do it. The amount of paperwork, background checks, visits, money and time it takes would scare off anyone. But, God had another thing in mind. He made the process so darn simple, that when people told me the horror stories, I could not relate. Also, the birth parents were so amenable to this process which made it even more shockingly easy.
When Tatum was born on November 22, 2012, the “official” adoption day seemed like an eon away. Also, she was with me from the minute she came out of the womb, so she always felt like my daughter; we had an incredible bond. Today, May 23, 2012, one day after her 6-month birthday, I entered the courtroom to become her official mommy.
My court representative asked me my name, address and a few other simple questions. Commissioner Rummage (the judge) spoke, “Tatum Isabella Knight is now officially your legal daughter.”
Nancy Ledner, Dick and Marilyn Jordahl, my mom and I teared up and smiled.
Without the constant love and support from a LONG LIST of people, I could not have done this.
Little Tatum, I love you with all my heart. May angels surround you, and may you be filled with knowledge of how special and loved you are. May God light your path, and may you have knowledge and passion for your FATHER and a relationship with Him through Christ.